“Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who’re in fact naughty.”

“Honestly, at your age, I prefer naughty.”

“Am I going to leave a big tip? I’m not even going to pay.”

“How long haven’t you been evolving?”

“A billion is a thousand million? Just to be on the safe side, run it by the accounting department.”

“What size would you like ma’am — e-mail, blog, or world wide web?”

“If you connect these dots, ladies and gentlemen, you’ll know our financial position.”

“Why should I go out in the real world when I have so much reality TV?”

“If I don’t love you, Susan, why’d I call you during anytime minutes instead of night and weekend minutes?”

“Once they stop believing that it’s flat, I’ll make it round.”

“We’ve been looking for our future C.E.O., and a star guided us here.”

“Don’t forget to pay dividends to your stockholders.”